Sunday Service

People are just as wonderful as sunsets if I can let them be. In fact, perhaps the reason we can truly appreciate a sunset is that we cannot control it. When I look at a sunset as I did the other evening, I don’t find myself saying, ‘Soften the orange a little on the right hand corner, and put a bit more purple along the base, and use a little more pink in the cloud color.’ I don’t do that. I don’t try to control a sunset. I watch it with awe as it unfolds. I like myself best when I can appreciate my staff member, my son, my daughter, my grandchildren, in this same way.

~ Carl Rogers

The most peaceful people that I know, and the most wise people that I know, are the ones who have created enough internal space to be able to allow all the parts of themselves to coexist despite the contradictions. So they have room for their creativity. They also have room for their fear. They have room for their dignity. They also have room for their shame. They have room for the parts of themselves that are glorious and divine and wonderful. And they have room for the parts of themselves that are petty and jealous and ridiculous. Right? Like, they create this big, huge auditorium of a landscape inside themselves. They don't kick any parts out, because guess what? You can't.

~ Elizabeth Gilbert

Why be a star when you can make a constellation?

~ Mariam Kaba

To be free, you must embrace

the breadth of your own existence

without apology…

But to actually be free, you must

know and you must fight for the entire

Universes inside of everyone else.

~ Julián Jamaica Soto

Once we reckon with the paradox of how the perceived other is both distinct, and a direct reflection of us, then we see ourselves in that mirror. We see everyone and everything as reflecting an aspect of ourself that we get to reclaim. Those we might have judged become guideposts for our own liberation. Our triggers become welcomed signs that we have rejected something inside us. The idea that you are either with us or against us is a limiting lens that perpetuates humanity's suffering. The recognition that you are us, that everyone is us, allows our self-love to humanize others into belonging.

~ Gareth Gwyn

The religious community is essential, for alone our vision is too narrow to see all that must be seen, and our strength too limited to do all that must be done. Together, our vision widens.

~ Rev. Dr. Mark Morrison-Reed

(Curated and adapted for KUF from the 2024 Soul Matters materials on the theme ‘Transformation')

There are many ways to kneel and kiss the ground.

~ Rumi

Lives are lived in parallel and perpendicular, fathomed nonlinearly, figured not in the straight graphs of “biography” but in many-sided, many-splendored diagrams… There are infinitely many kinds of beautiful lives.

~ Maria Popova

Inclusivity is not ‘how do we make you a part of what we are?’ but ‘how do we become more of what you are?’

~ angel Kyodo williams Sensei

Diversity is being invited to the party; inclusion is being asked to dance.

~ Verna Myers

Diversity is not just about the differences you like.

~ Eboo Patel

Pluralism isn’t easy. It’s a constant willingness to self-challenge and to look at where we might be wrong, or limited; even with regard to pluralism itself. It requires a capacity to detach ourselves from our agendas, our beliefs, our commitments, and to recognize that there may be other ways. And it also requires us to recognize that we can never wholly achieve that.

~ Mick Cooper

Differences challenge assumptions.

~ Anne Wilson Schaef

He drew a circle that shut me out-Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout.But love and I had the wit to win:We drew a circle and took him In!
~ Edwin Markham

You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.

~ Friedrich Nietzsche

When we lose the right to be different, we lose the privilege to be free.

~ Charles Evan Hughes

The first thing I am is a person… But people either relate to you as an Indian or as a woman. They relate to you as a category.

~ Winona LaDuke

Ask yourself, “What kinds of people do I talk about but never talk with?” Whoever is underrepresented in your life, will be overrepresented in your imagination!... This is the truth of our divided landscape.

~ Mónica Guzman

Our [many] identities… should be praised, celebrated and paraded in the streets. They are Mardi gras and gumbo pots… refusing to be boxed in.

~ Lana LosAngeles

(Curated and adapted for KUF from the 2024 Soul Matters materials on the theme ‘Pluralism')

May 2, 2024

This list of questions is an aid for deep reflection. They are not meant to be answered as much as to take you on a journey.

Read through the list of questions 2-3 times until one question sticks out for you and captures your attention, or as some faith traditions say, until one of the questions “shimmers.”

Then reflect on that question using one or all of these questions:

~ What is going on in my life right now that makes this question so pronounced for me?

~ How might my inner voice be trying to speak to me through it?

~ How might Life or my inner voice be trying to offer me a word of comfort or challenge through this question?

Writing out your thoughts often enables you to go deeper. It also sometimes helps to read the list of questions to a friend or loved one and ask them which question they think is the question you need to wrestle with.

A note about self-care: Often these questions take us to a vulnerable space. It is OKAY to ignore the questions that may be triggering – or lean in if that feels safe.

~ What were you taught in your family of origin about pluralism and welcoming difference? How does that still impact you today?

~ Has an experience of being included permanently left a mark on you?

~ Whose refusal to conform made it possible for you to add your uniqueness to the diversity of the world?

~ If you could go back and change a moment of being excluded or excluding someone else, what would it be?

~ Have you ever been treated like a category rather than a person?

~ If you weren’t afraid of being judged or rejected, what part of your diverse self would you let out into the world?

~ What part of your pluralistic self do you have the hardest time acknowledging or embracing with compassion? Your judgmental self? Your lazy self? Your vulnerable self? Your bitter self? Your easily frightened self? Your quick-to-anger self? Your jealous self? Your petty self? Your selfish self?

~ What aspect of your life partner, child or close friend do you need to do a better job of embracing and welcoming in?

~ When it comes to age, our society is not as pluralistic as it thinks. Have you been ignored or cast out because of your age? Was it more emotionally challenging to accept than you expected?

~ Is it possible that the aspect that so annoys you about that other person echoes a similar part of yourself you deny?

~ It’s said that we exile the parts of ourselves that were once humiliated in our past. Which tender part of your younger self is whispering, “Please let me back in.”

~ It’s said “Whoever is underrepresented in your life, will be overrepresented in your imagination.“ So who is underrepresented in your life? Are they overrepresented in your imagination?

~ Most on-going disagreements are sources of pain, division and discomfort. But ironically some disagreements feel “fruitful“ ;They somehow enrich us and our relationships. How has a precious “fruitful disagreement” changed you? Is there wisdom from this fruitful disagreement that could be applied to other areas of your life?

~ Our friends and family each carry/believe/tell a different story about who we are. Whose version of you most closely matches your authentic self? Whose version do you disagree with most strongly? Whose version challenges you to be your best self? Whose do you hope to someday become?

~ What’s your question? Your question may not be listed above. As always, if the above questions don't include what life is asking from you, spend the month listening to your days to find it.

(Curated and adapted for KUF from the 2024 Soul Matters materials on the theme ‘Pluralism’)



I wonder how the moonflower feels

about its sweet sister, the morning glory.

What it must be to know that world longingly awaits another

while you must seek solace hidden under a night sky.

When the world has told you to hide,

it is only the shadows that welcome you in.

And while blooming in the dark has its beauty,

it’s also a lonely way to live.

And who can blame this moon-drenched cousin for wanting to hide.

After all, we too know what happens out there in the light of day.

We are parsed and picked over,

told who and what we need to be,

so that we will finally be loved,

finally let in.

And so we shape shift

until our own original curvature is no longer remembered,

until our masks become indistinguishable from our face,

until the pieces of us allowed out in the sun

forget the parts buried deep in the cold earthen layers of time.

Maybe that is what the moonflower

is doing out there in the dark.

Maybe it’s not hiding after all

but instead trying to remember

who it once was.

Or maybe it knows who it is

and its blooming is a way of saying

“Come find me. I’m still here.”

Which, of course, means that maybe this month

is not just about making it safe for others to come out of the shadows

but also a reminder that we all have pieces and parts buried in the dark.

So friends, what do you say?

Let’s go find them.

Let’s put ourselves back together again.

(Curated and adapted for KUF from the 2024 Soul Matters materials on the theme ‘Pluralism’)

Ask Them About Pluralism

One of the best ways to explore our monthly themes is to have conversations about them with people who are close to you. It not only deepens our conversations but also our relationships. Below is a list of “pluralism questions” to help you on your way.

Be sure to let your conversation partner know in advance that this won’t be a typical conversation. Telling them a bit about Soul Matters will help set the stage. Come to your group ready to share what surprised you about the conversation(s) and what gift or insight it gave you.

Pluralism Questions

• What were you taught in your family of origin about pluralism and welcoming difference? How does that still impact you today?

• Has an experience of being included permanently left a mark on you?

• If you weren’t afraid of being judged or rejected, what part of yourself would you let out into the world?

• If you could go back and change a moment of being excluded or excluding someone else, what would it be?

• What part of your pluralistic self do you have the hardest time acknowledging or embracing with compassion? Your judgmental self? Your lazy self? Your vulnerable self? Your bitter self? Your easily frightened self? Your quick-to-anger self? Your jealous self? Your petty self? Your selfish self?

• When it comes to age, our society is not as pluralistic as it thinks. Have you been ignored or cast out because of your age? Was it more emotionally challenging to accept than you expected?

• Our friends and family each carry/believe/tell a different story about who we are. Whose version of you most closely matches your authentic self? Whose version do you disagree with most strongly? Whose version challenges you to be your best self? Whose do you hope to someday become?

(Curated and adapted for KUF from the 2024 Soul Matters materials on the theme ‘Pluralism’)

The Many Views from Your Many Windows

We talk a lot about how our different perspectives help us understand this life of ours more fully. But might it also be true that those different views help us appreciate this life more fully as well? That is the idea behind the “View From My Window” movement that came into being during Covid. The effort simply asked people to take a picture from their window and share it with others online. Doing so not only got everyone vicariously outside when everyone was afraid of doing that in person, but it also renewed people’s spirits by reminding them that life offers us beauty in so many forms, not just struggle in so many forms.

So for your creative project this month, play with views from a window. There are many ways to approach this. You could collect pictures from the many windows and views that make up your life, taking photos from the windows at your home, your work, your favorite dinner, your car on a favorite drive. Or you could make it a group effort and ask your family and friends to send you pictures from their favorite window.

Along the way and at the end, take some time to ask yourself what impact this has on you. What gift might life be trying to give you through it? How might it be trying to remind you that life offers us beauty in so many forms, not just struggle in so many forms. And why is that reminder so important to you right now?

(Curated and adapted for KUF from the 2024 Soul Matters materials on the theme ‘Pluralism’)